Tracks in the Snow

 

Back in the ’70s, I once drove my mother to visit her elderly aunt who lived in another state, and was then in her 90s.  We were in her dining room chatting when an elderly man walked into the room – her son, who was clearly in his late sixties or early 70s.  I thought it was hillarious when my great-aunt said, “There’s my little Carl.” 

 

Flash forward to the ’80s.  I was standing at the porcelain sink in my kitchen, washing dishes, when it hit me, “I am going to be a mother for the rest of my life!”   That in itself wasn’t a newsflash, but the realization that there would never again be a time when I stopped worrying about my kids, was.  

 

I’d never thought about that before…that that vulnerable place in my heart which arrived with each of our sons, was there to stay, regardless of their age.   I finally understood my great-aunt. 

 

Two days ago I experienced a fresh dose of that heart-rending realization.

 

My college-age son has been on crutches since his knee injury November 23rd.  (See 10 Reasons to be Thankful – Nov. 24).   We’ve had snow, ice, and cold temps in the past week, and because it’s so difficult for him to get around, I’ve been starting my son’s car for him, brushing off the snow and scraping the windows.  

 

That morning, I was putting the finishing touches on his car prep when I spotted my son making his way out our front door, balancing a heavy backpack and maneuvering his crutches down our icy and snowy front steps.   He made it to the car, placed his crutches in the front passenger seat, plunked down his backpack, and got in.  (It’s his left knee that’s injured so he can still drive.)

 

I watched him back out of the driveway and disappear down the street, then turned to go back in the house.  That’s when I saw his tracks in the snow.  And my heart felt it.  That for-the-rest-of-my-life truth. 

 

 

A Saturday P.S.:  Son had an MRI early yesterday morning – (like 6:30 a.m).  The results say he has a severed ACL and a torn MCL.    “(I) will have no fear of bad news; (my) heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.”  Psalm 112:7  NIV

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9 Responses

  1. Parents will for ever be parents, just wish the children empathize with parents more.

    I wrote a piece on the same topic before, would like to share it with you.

    http://novice101.wordpress.com/2008/08/17/

  2. Precious. Truly precious. I love your mother’s heart.

  3. What a cute analogy. I am an almost empty nester myself. I have 3 sons 21, 19 and 16. My 2 oldest sons are in college. It is so hard to feel the nest changing.

  4. You were kind enough to leave a heartfelt comment on my blog when I wrote about tending my topiary heart way back last September, before you were blogging, I believe.
    I have just linked back from your comment to your blog and LOVE IT.
    I love your talk of being a Mum, your photos and look forward to reading all your past entries and those to come.
    Thank you.

  5. How sweet and touching! I know just how you feel too. I have had those kind of feelings all week with Christmas around the corner…..stronger than usual!

  6. Since reading your post and your list of things to be thankful for when your son hurt his knee, I have been taken back to the time when my son put the car upside down in the drainage ditch and had to the fight of his life to save himself from drowning. I raised him to make up his own mind and lead his life as a responsible adult but he knows that if I text or call saying I am having a “Mummy moment” he knows that I am concerned for him, that I have been taken back to that scary time and that nothing else in the world truly matters to me apart from the safety of my boy, however old he is. He knows to get in touch as soon as he can. I am sure other mothers recognise this “mummy moment”.

  7. Thank you for stopping by my blog and leaving such sweet comments. I am just now getting out into the bloggy world. Thanks for praying for Dustin he is still running fever. He has never been this sick.

    I will be praying for your son. I am sorry that the MRI was serious. My sister had knee surgery from a basketball accident years ago. I think it was the same type injury. She is doing well now, as I am sure your son will.

  8. Awww. Poor guy. This is an incredible blog. Thank you for your heart.

  9. It’s a sobering thought, isn’t it? I hope he’s on the mend soon!

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